All Around Me
by f3iv3lin3
Summary: Set in S5: Kate is back on the island and guilt ridden for leaven Aaron behind and finds comfort in Juliet


The sun is setting with a golden-red glow over the horizon, coloring the few clouds scattered across the darkening sky a pink shade.

Kate hates the end of a day and the moment it empties her hands to leave them unoccupied, hates the freedom of mind the lack of a task brought. Her thoughts are already making their way to the memories that keep haunting her every night since she'd come back here to this place of insanity, of terror and death.

She'd known she would miss him. He wouldn't stop being a part of her just because there was an ocean between them. He had been the center of her world for three years. He had taught her steadiness and had filled her heart with the unique kind of love only a child could give.

Of course she would miss him. Only, she hadn't expected it to hurt this much, hadn't expected to miss the small things as much as his smile, his laughter, his voice when he called her "mommy" with his arms outstretched. It was just too much.

At this time of day she used to crawl in bed with him, read one chapter only to be convinced easily to read another one before she'd tuck him in, kissed him good night and said the most pure and straight from the heart "I love you" that had ever left her lips.

Kate's hand freezes on the wrench as the last tool to put back in its place, her hand lowering with the tears that well up with a burning sensation. She bites her lip to keep them at bay.

She wasn't alone and when Kate generally disliked people seeing her vulnerable, the woman moving in her back was one of the last people, she would want to see her with her guard down, naked and fragile.

"Are you okay?", she hears a soft voice surprisingly close to her neck as she pulls her hand back and was about to turn around but waits, until she manages to blink away the last bit of her tears, cursing herself silently she couldn't keep it together until she was left alone.

"Fine." she mumbles as she finally turns, avoiding those intense ocean blue eyes, she can feel running over her face now.

The silence leaves a heaviness in the air between them that feels different than the one Kate remembers. It wasn't as angry, as aggressive but somewhat expectant.

Juliet heaves a heavy sigh before speaking, her voice low and somewhat gentle: "You don't have to pretend, Kate. You can just tell me to mind my own business."

Her words pull Kate's eyes up to meet hers and their brilliancy draws the air out of the brunette's lungs momentarily. She'd always been somewhat fascinated by their shade of blue, even when she'd looked into them with hatred. But they look different today than they had, three years ago. Softer somehow, warmer and without those walls that shut everyone out.

Kate's eyes narrow slightly as curiosity adds to the pain of her memories. It feels like she's looking at a completely different person than she remembers Juliet to be and yet, everything seems all too familiar.

"Mind your own business.", Kate repeats her words, but lacks of the usual aggressive tone Juliet used to trigger in her at any given moment. Instead, her voice sounds weary and thin and more like a plea than harsh command.

The smile fades from Juliet's lips as her jar muscles tense but she wouldn't look or back away. It is then, Kate realizes just how close she is. So close in fact, now that she puts her attention to it, she can feel a hint of the warmth of her body. The sensation births a restlessness in her chest that turns her head to escape the intensity of Juliet's piercing blue eyes.

"I know we didn't exactly meet under the best circumstances.", Juliet says, her voice hardly more than a whisper. A bitter chuckle that follows the short pause, in which Juliet takes a breath, startles Kate enough to catch the harsh remark in her throat, about how Juliet could think anything about the way they had imet/i - or how she could even use a casual word like that - had been even remotely positive.

"I guess they couldn't have been worse, actually.", Juliet continues, the laugh trailing into her first words and put a weary smile on her lips.

There's something about the way she drops her head for a second, how she interlaces her fingers in a nervous kind of way, that takes the edge of the situation, makes Kate curious to hear where this was going.

"What I mean is", Juliet says, meeting Kate's eyes again but there is a shyness in the way she does, that doesn't fit the picture she'd had of the blonde all those years, at all. "I'm here if you need someone to talk to."

Kate is startled by her words and even more by the sincere kindness in her eyes, the way she smiles for just a second but doesn't really and takes another deep breath into the silence.

Juliet seems to read Kate's stillness, her lack of an answer, as a rejection she doesn't want to wait and hear uttered out loud and before the brunette manages to collect her thoughts, to find some order in the chaos that was now lose in her chest, the blonde turns as she drops her eyes once more.

She'd taken only a few steps, but it was enough distance for Kate to feel an impulse urging her to hold her back. She doesn't know what causes the words to come out - maybe the lack of her warmth as Juliet retreats or the overwhelming loneliness that washes over her at the prospect of yet another lonely night where she cries herself to sleep - but she speaks and only realizes it after she has, breathlessly and suffocated.

"I left him behind."

An embarrassed smile tugs on her lips, when her words cause Juliet to stop and slowly turn around again.

"Aaron.", Kate elaborates and feels the tears return at the mention of his name and the memories that are attached to it.

"I've raised him for the past three years. He is the most adorable little boy." She doesn't know why she keeps talking even though her voice is so shaky and thin, she's almost sure it will fail her at the next word.

But something about the way Juliet looks at her then, with her head slightly tilted, her eyes full of compassion and a flicker of pain, like she can relate to Kate's, radiates a comfort and connection, she is in desperate need of.

Juliet nods slightly but keeps the distance between them and Kate feels herself wishing she didn't, wishing she was as close. Close enough to feel the warmth of her body, inhale her scent, feel her skin.

"I miss him so much.", Kate sobs now, her tears flowing freely like an avalanche tread loose and she doesn't even care that Juliet sees them and her fall apart. On some weird, twisted level, despite her vulnerability, despite who she was confiding in, she feels safe.

Kate drops her eyes, not really sure what else to say. Juliet's hands framing her face come unexpectedly, the touch causing a prickling, where her palms lie gently upon her freckled cheeks. She doesn't dare lift her head, too overwhelming the sensation of her skin, too confusing the shiver it sends down her spine and blurs the image of a little blonde boy on her inner eye.

But she can still see him, can still feel the guilt twisting her insides and the burning in her heart the echo of his voice causes and wishes she didn't. She'd been holding on to every little detail since the goodbye and for the first time, she fears the images more than she wants to drown in them.

It's a reflex, when Kate mirrors Juliet and takes her face in her hands. She wants to connect, doesn't want to linger in the empty halo of a memory but feel reality, feel her.

It's part fear, part desire that brushes her lips against Juliet's. Fear to be haunted by the cold, devastating shadow of what she'd lost. Desire to feel Juliet's warmth, her heartbeat and her own body come alive under her hands.

And it does, with a pounding heart and all her sense on edge when Juliet's lips respond, her body pushing her back and the collision with the edge of the work bench sends a sharp pain through her lower back Kate is only faintly aware of.

Juliet's hands run down the sides of her body without hesitation, like she knows Kate's curves by heart while their teeth clash, tongues push hungrily against each other.

Kate hadn't expected her to be this demanding, to be the first to unzip the top of the jumpsuit and feel her hands cup her breasts as she slips one thigh in between hers. But she surrenders to her touch easily and gladly, leans back her head when Juliet's lips explore her neck and moans at the sensation.

There's no image at the back of her eyelids anymore but Juliet's hands all over her body as Juliet pulls down the top of the jumpsuit and pushes the brunette onto the work bench, runs her fingers along the thin line of naked skin on her lower belly while leaving fluttering kisses along her collarbone, and the combination causes Kate to tremble in ecstasy and desire for more.

Juliet's hips press between her legs and Kate snakes them instinctively around the blonde, pulling her closer, pressing her a little harder against her heat.

However close Juliet is, it still feels like she isn't close enough and doesn't feel enough of her. Kate's hands frame her face again and gently but determined pull her up. She looks at her then, runs her eyes over the hot red flush on her cheeks, her swollen lips and feels like drowning in the ocean that are her eyes when she reaches them. They are slightly clouded over with the exhilaration of the moment, she looks back at Kate and there is a confidence in their depth that catches the breath in Kate's throat.

For a moment everything slows down, Kate's fingertips running from Juliet's forehead to the side of her face hardly touch the hot skin and it is Juliet now who trembles under her touch. Kate doesn't smile, nor does Juliet. They don't need a trivial confirmation like that to let the other know, every touch is appreciate, every kiss desired. They can feel it in the heat of the other's skin, the racing of her hearts.

Kate pulls Juliet into another deep kiss, feels blonde's hips move against the heat between her legs slowly and rhythmically as she frees her torso from the thick dark blue fabric of her jump suit, snakes her arms around Juliet's neck to pull her even closer, feels her hard nipples pressing into her breasts.

Juliet's lips escape a moan as Kate pulls off her shirt and covers her chest with hungry kisses, trails her tongue down the middle, runs her fingers in a feather light touch down her sides and makes her shiver again. The scent of fresh skin mixes with the slightly peachy one of her hair, the sweetness of her skin and clouds Kate's head, reduces her thoughts to only one - to feel Juliet everywhere and everything of her.

She feels one of her hands being covered by Juliet's as the older woman pulls back a little, desire burning in her eyes. Guiding it to her chest she puts Kate's palm flat against it and the brunette can feel the hard beating in her chest.

Slowly Juliet slides Kate's hand down her slightly sweaty stomach, her muscles tensing under her touch and the sensation as well as the direction Juliet's is leading hers makes her squirm in anticipation to feel her and she wets her lips.

Reaching the waistband of her underwear Juliet eases her grip, feeling Kate's yearning in the slight tremble of her fingers against her skin and closes her eyes as the brunette's fingers reach lower. The heat against her fingertips increases with every inch closer and touching wet skin, Juliet arches against her with a loud moan before capturing Kate's lips but her tongue doesn't respond, too paralyzed by the teasing she earns.

Kate runs hers along the small gap between Juliet's swollen lips and her middle finger over her grown and appreciative sensitive nub, causing a sharp intake of breath from the blonde. Taking her bottom lip in between her teeth she lowers her hand a little deeper between her legs, strokes her hot wet folds tenderly.

Juliet's throws her head back, freeing her lip with a slight pinch from Kate's teeth and the sight of her exposed neck, her breasts, firm and well rounded, makes it hard for Kate to enjoy Juliet's arousal and not push her over the edge this very moment just to hear her scream, have the sound fill her head, her body and drown in it.

Carefully, without causing too much friction but enough to have her hips beg for more, her breath be rapid, Kate presses her palm onto her clit, moves it with the slow strokes over her folds and covers her chest, the soft flesh of her breasts, her hard nipples with kisses and draws wet lines, sucks on her neck as she pulls her back and close against herself.

Juliet presses her forehead against the brunette's, her eyes half open, eyelids fluttering slightly with every caress of Kate's hand.

Kate feels like she's losing herself in the sight, the pleasure written all over her ivory face, and there's a strange kind of understanding tugging at the edges of her consciousness that Juliet needed the connection of their bodies, the feeling of someone close, of falling apart under a touch, just as much as she does.

Maybe Juliet realizes Kate is looking at her differently now, sees what she's been trying to hide but can't with all her senses on edge, about to tip over into the sweetness of her climax because she presses her lips onto Kate's, puts her hands with a firm grip on her breasts and thrusts her hips against the brunette's until she earns a cry from her lips.

Kate's eyes flutter shut at the sensation of Juliet's fingertips drawing parallel lines down her stomach, tensing her muscles in appreciation to feel them shortly after dipping into her own wetness, draw circles between her legs that rob her of all control over body and mind.

When their teeth clash again, their breaths meeting the one of the others hot and hard, shockwaves run through Kate's body with a force that was both, violent and deliciously numbing, painting light points at the back of her eyelids when she cries out loud.

Her hand clenches in Juliet's hair as she feels Juliet's lips press against the middle of her chest, her teeth scrape over her skin as she follows her over the rocky outcrop of oblivion.

Slowly but relentlessly the world falls back into place around them, surrounding them with chirping, wrapping them in the last red-golden glow of the disappearing sun.

Juliet pulls back, her hot breath still lingering on the Kate's skin. She doesn't look up until Kate gently cups her cheek.

Their eyes lock and silently explore the other's for a while, their breaths slowly recovering, the sweat cooling their heated bodies.

A sad, compassionate smile twitches in the corners of Kate's mouth before she whispers softly: "Who did you leave behind?"


End file.
